And now it begins.

I have made a lot of goals this year as I'm sure most of you have.  I love this time of year for more than one reason.  One of the specific reasons that I really enjoy this time of year is for reflection of the greatness of achieving those goals. Lets be honest. Most people haven't even come close to achieving their goals but I'm going to optimistic and think that most of you have.  I came up with goals to achieve throughout the year not necessarily at the beginning of the year. I have written them down just not all in one place.  The back of checks, sticky notes on my desk, pages of books that I'm reading, pages of my scriptures, back of pictures that trigger memories too tender to look at everyday. But the great thing is: I remember them all. So, the following is the compilation of the goals that I have set out to do in no specific order.

1-Learn to be happy with myself
2-Achieve for greater things then just the basics
3-Fall in love with a passion
4-Share that passion
5-Fall in love with idea
6-Fall in love with someone
7-Spread the gospel
8-Find a reason to smile everyday
9-Talk to Heavenly Father more then just your problems but for what you love
10-Spend time with the family
11-Spend time with yourself
12-Learn how to love more than what you are
13-Make strides to better those around you.
14-Better your ability to speak with people

I think I have missed a few. I will have to check in my random drawers at work and see what I find. Some of these I work on everyday and there are some that you can't. I am proud to say, however, that I have achieved most if not all of these things.  Some of them took longer then others while some were painful to go through. Its one of the greatest things about this life. You get to choose how you respond to different things in life.

 At the beginning of the year I had a discussion with a dear friend of mine.  We were talking about the things that we were hoping to achieve in life this upcoming year.  Most people don't know this but when I first came home from my mission I was horribly bitter.  I didn't want to do anything, be with anyone, do anything, was rude to my immediate family (which makes me horribly sad) or do anything that involved teaching or going to church.  I shared this experience with my friend, we will call her Iz. Iz was extremely shocked.  She said I was a fabulous faker and had no idea that I was going through so many problems.  Thanks to a wonderful Bishop I was really able to combat those problems by having me teach Relief Society and Sunday School.  He also put my name up for working at the temple.  I still had a testimony, that wasn't the problem, I just didn't think that I was worthy or was wanted at any of these things.  The Bishop helped me understand that there was nothing wrong with me and it was just in my head and the adversary getting to me. So Iz and I started naming things that we wanted to achieve. I thought of all the possible things that I could think of that would help get rid of the bitterness and replace that with love and passion.  I think I have achieved that.  All of them.

I love spending time with myself and getting to know who I am now.  I know how to approach people and talk to them. Some not in the most tactful way but that wasn't one of my goals :-). I have been able to be used as a confidant with friends around me and help them. I have fallen in love with someone, and still am.  He just doesn't know it and won't for some time if ever. I have fallen in love with wonderful ideas and goals and I share them through work, temple attendance and talking to people.  I have many passions and am not afraid to shout them from the mountain tops, football still being one of the highest ones. I spend time with the family but am working on that one daily.  I am finally starting to really see myself as I need to see myself.  Not as the world wants to see me.  I am finally happy with what I have been able to do and what I will continue to do. I spread the gospel, one smile at a time. I heard a quote yesterday that was something along these lines: In a smile you can find love, light, passion, commitment, tenderness, kindness and most of the all, knowledge.  A smile is a true sign of knowing the truth of the Gospel by knowing who you are and what you can do.  A smile is the true sign of the happy-ness of the gospel.

Love the days you live and miss the days you don't.